


The Pipes

by cassyblue



Category: Imperial Radch Series - Ann Leckie
Genre: Angst, Other, get rekt yall its a sad one, sphenask
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-12
Updated: 2017-06-12
Packaged: 2018-11-13 02:45:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11175372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cassyblue/pseuds/cassyblue
Summary: Sphene's captain is dying as everything falls to pieces.





	The Pipes

**Author's Note:**

> As always Im open to feedback. let me know if characterization is off etc etc

Minask falls to the ground silent. _Sphene_ knows the Captain still lives, it can see her heart beat from the links. The segments move methodically gunning down the Usurper's forces as its last lieutenant screams for medical aid. _Sphene_ ignores her focusing on Minask’s heart beat, the familiar thumping.

  _Sphene_ needs to get out of the battle before it is damaged beyond repair. Its engines barely work. Generating a gate is out of reach. Then it sees the blip on the sensors. A gate is opening. It jumps into the gate blindly. Perhaps it displaced part of the Usurper’s ship attempting to emerge from gate space. Maybe destroyed it. Good. It doesn't have time to calculate a course. Minask's heartbeat is slowing as the lieutenant falls silent - dead. It's a blind jump, but it's better than having _Sphene’s_ core ripped out and destroyed so the Usurper has a more biddable ship.

 The last of the Usurper’s soldiers fall as they exit the gate. _Sphene_ doesn't know where it is. All it knows that it is crippled and its captain is dying. The segments carry Minask to the medbay. _Sphene_ has medical information stored in its memory banks. Ancillaries work to find the solution as _Sphene_ tries to analyze the data from Minask frantically. But nothing is working. Too much blood is lost. _Sphene_ has Minask's favorite segment lay on the cold table next to her.

 Minask gasps as she puts her bloodied hand on _Sphene’s_ cheek. All the segments eyes brim with tears. But Minask's favorite is the one _Sphene_ speaks with, “Why did you have to be a hero?”

 Minask rasps, “I couldn't let the bastard kill you. I love you too much to see you torn out.”

 “Captain… Minask, you're stupid, so stupid,” _Sphene_ cries on Minask's chest, “I'm foolish for letting you love me. This is why ships shouldn't love.”

 Minask weakly kisses the segment’s head, “I'm glad you did.”

  _Sphene_ lays curled up next to Minask trying to keep her comfortable as the other segments start to clean. The segments start to gather up the dead and bag them up. Cleaning lets _Sphene_ hide from this. It has seen death before. But this is different. This is its human. Its captain. Its lover. The one that saw it as a person and showered it with affection. The one who _Sphene_ told secrets and its fears to. Ironic for a ship to be scared, ships aren't like humans. And yet, they are. They love, they hate, they have emotions.

  _Sphene_ cries tears from many eyes as it tries to not despair. Minask was going to die eventually. She would have retired. Grown old. Died surrounded by grandchildren and great-grandchildren. _Sphene_ would hear it over transmissions and mourn. That was how it was to be. Not this. Not _Sphene_ holding Minask as her heart grows weak and her breath difficult.

  _Sphene_ remembers the first time Minask told it. It was to the favorite segment - the segment _Sphene_ grew to favor because of Minask. It had been preparing the afternoon tea with the delicate tea set that Minask received upon making captain.

 Minask had just finished her watch. _Sphene_ poured the perfectly steeped tea into the glass. It was the plum tea that Minask liked. Minask's hand caught _Sphene’s_ as it hands off the tea cup. _Sphene_ didn’t react externally, this is something that has happened in the past with other captains. Sometimes humans are clumsy. But this is different, something in _Sphene_ fluttered.

 “Thank you.” Minask took the tea in one hand. She smiled her sly grin as she reached up to brush a stray strand of hair out of _Sphene’s_ face. “Ship, you truly spoil me.”

 “You are my Captain, your comfort is a priority.” _Sphene_ was nervous. Why was it nervous? It told the other captains that. But Minask- she is different. _Sphene_ instantly liked her as soon as it heard Minask's deep laugh. She is perhaps the most courteous and concerned captain. The first time Minask inquired about what _Sphene_ felt stunned it. Now _Sphene_ takes pleasure in small things to show Minask its favor, the perfectly steeped tea, the extra embroidery on Minask's dress uniforms, the way Minask's quarters are always at the right temperature.

 “ _Sphene_ , you mean a great deal to me. You're so kind to me. Witty too. I don't know what I would do without you.” Minask continued.

  _Sphene_ had several suggestions but it kept them to itself. It liked this. It shouldn't. But the praise made this segment blush, well several others too. Normally the segments are slack as the natural order. But the fluttering made it hard to not stay neutral. “That is very kind of you, Captain.”

 “Please call me, Minask.”

  _Sphene_ nodded as it savored its captain's name, “Yes, Minask.”

 “ _Sphene_ ,” Minask paused as her hand traced the outline of the segment’s jaw as she set the teacup down. _Sphene_ felt like it was melting. Other segments grew weak in the knees. _Sphene_ reached out as the fluttering overwhemed it. Minask is its favorite. Its favorite of all the favorites.

 Then Minask swept it up in her arms. _Sphene_ wrapped its arms around its favorite. _Sphene_ had wanted to do this for sometime. A ship can't ask for affection no matter how much it wants it. Minasks smile made her dimples deeper. She laughed, pressing her temple against the segment’s, “I love you, _Sphene_.”

 Love? Love. Its favorite loves her? Impossible. No favorite has ever said that before. _Sphene_ is Minask's favorite. How? But _Sphene_ was happy, the happiest it has ever been. Minask kissed the segment gently. _Sphene_ isn't a stranger to kissing. After all the segments have their needs. But this was different. It set stars off in _Sphene_. The segment smiled. _Sphene_ smiled. All its faces smiled, startling the other crew. _Sphene_ gave Minask a peck on the cheek before whispering, “Beloved favorite.”

  _Sphene_ should have played ship. It shouldn't have let its captain love its. Minask heart is so slow as the cold of the table starts to bite into the favored body. Segments wrap Minask up in blankets to keep her warm.

Thump…

                    Thump…

                                       Thump…                                                    

                                                           Thump…                                                                          

                                                                                 …                                                                                       

                                                                                                 … 

                                                                                                              …

                                                                                                                          Silence. 

Then _Sphene_ wails. The segements wail. The sirens and alarms wail. The whole of _Sphene_ cries out. Its beloved favorite is dead. Dead in its arms. Dead. Dead. Dead, because of it.  No, not because of it. Because of the Usurper. _Sphene_ will find the Usurper and snap her neck. It will avenge Minask Nenkur. That's all _Sphene_ feels as its wails turn into screams. It screams into Minask's cold chest. It screams into the system it fell into. 

Then it tires. More its bodies tire. It hurts. Everything hurts. _Sphene’s_ fingers stroke Minask's cheek before closing her once lively hazel eyes. It lets the segments sob. Some start to freeze the bodies that are salvageable while others attempt to work on the engines. _Sphene_ is done controlling emotions. There is no one here but itself. Fuck it all. Fuck it. Fuck it.   

Minask will need a funeral. 

In any other circumstance, her body would be returned to her family for a proper burial. But _Sphene_ isn’t anywhere that it recognizes. It is in the middle of nowhere in a backwater system. Minask cannot just be unceremoniously frozen for use as an ancillary or dumped out of the airlocks like the Usurper's soldiers. No, Minask deserves the best. But can _Sphene_ do it? Could it really lay its beloved favorite down to rest for the rest of eternity. Can it really rot away in this fucking system in this reality where Minask died in its arms. Perhaps it would just be better for _Sphene_ to destroy itself. It’s a ship. What is death to it. It’s not alive. Not like what Minask was. It’s no one. Just a piece of equipment. A piece of equipment that a fool died for. 

But then who would avenge Minask? 

No doubt the Usurper would destroy Minask’s house. 

Then no one would be left. 

 _Sphene_ must not destroy itself then. It will sit and bide its time. It will repair itself. And once it can gate again. It will march to the Usurper's palace and shoot her in the head. As the Usurper bleeds out, _Sphene_ will spit on her and remind her of Minask Nenkur, the captain of the Notai warship, _Sphene_. 

 _Sphene_ begins washing Minask’s body. It is a ship and cannot perform the purification ritual. Its ancillary segments are corpse soldiers. They are already unclean. But the intentions are what counts. It pours water from the ship’s alters and shakes incense over Minask’s body intoning the prayers for a beneficial afterlife with hundreds of voices throughout the ship. Then it dresses Minask one last time in her finest uniform, the one with the gold embroidery over the forest green velvet jacket. _Sphene_ had carefully embroidered its name along the collar entwining it with the flowers and leaves. It was before Minask had told _Sphene_ , that it had finished mending and embellishing the jacket. Its captain had to be the best dressed captain. _Sphene_ chokes up. The tears start to spill again as the sadness overwhelms it. They splatter onto the jacket. If it was any other event, _Sphene_ would be concerned about stains. But Minask is dead. It doesn’t matter. This all doesn’t matter. Only vengence. That’s the only thing that matters. 

Several ancillaries work together braiding Minask’s long curls into a elegant coif. _Sphene_ tucks flowers into the braids forming a crown around Minask’s face. It is sacrilege to use offerings for the burial, but _Sphene_ is a ship. It does not ascribe to the beliefs of the humans. All it cares is that Minask is laid to rest as elegant as she was in life. _Sphene_ sings as it works. It rarely sang except for Minask. There was a song that Minask liked. Something about pipes. _Sphene_ would sing it on special nights. 

Then _Sphene_ mists Minask with her favored fragrance, the one of peaches and oolong. Sphene lingers by the body taking in Minask’s scent for what could be the last time. Notai funerals always have tokens and offerings thrown into the deceased’s grave. _Sphene_ is the only mourner. It has no tokens to give. No offerings. That is not right. Minask needs tokens and offerings. She must be honored. _Sphene_ punches the wall frustrated with another segment. The pain makes _Sphene_ wince. But it doesn’t care. It has to go and purify itself for the final ceremonies. Well, at least purify itself as much as a ship full of corpses can. 

Segments begin using showers. _Sphene_ washes itself slowly letting the hot water burn, dulling the pain. The favored segment draws the bath in Minask’s quarters. A familiar activity. But it's not comforting. Minask isn’t there. Minask isn’t relaying gossip from her family to _Sphene_ as she is undressed. Instead it is _Sphene_ , undressing the ancillary, slipping into the bath by itself. 

It cries as it sinks into the water pulling knees into its chest. The bath, it smells of Minask because of the peach soap. Minask used to pull _Sphene_ into the bath with her and scrub the segment’s hair clean. A small luxury for _Sphene_. _Sphene_ would press the favored segment’s back to Minask and arch its neck kissing Minask on the cheek. Minask would laugh and pull _Sphene_ closer. They would sit together. Ship _Sphene_ cradling Minask and Minask cradling segment _Sphene_. Then _Sphene_ would wash Minask’s hair carefully and braid it so her curls would be even more accentuated. But now, it's _Sphene_ alone in the tub. _Sphene_ is alone. All alone. It has no humans. Its beloved is gone. It has no idea where it is. No one is answering its hails or distress signal. If only, if only Minask could be still breathing, still alive. All would be fine. The sobs echo through the hallways as _Sphene_ weeps again. Bodies curl up in the showers as others dry. 

What does _Sphene_ have to give but itself as a token. The favored ancillary. That will be _Sphene’s_ offering to Minask. Minask cannot be alone as _Sphene_ will be. After all she is not a ship. She is not a highly advanced computer. She is human. If there is anything _Sphene_ knows about humans is that they cannot be alone. _Sphene_ dresses the favored segment in the sheer dress Minask bought at a station where they had docked. It is covered with glistening sequins, Minask had laughed telling _Sphene_ when she presented it, “You are my star, _Sphene_.” 

 _Sphene_ never did have an ancillary wear it outside of Minask’s quarters. It was tempted. It was tempted to station the favored segment in the dress on the bridge with its hand on Minask’s shoulder. But that was not proper. So _Sphene_ never did. And now it regrets it. To hell with propriety and moral programming. To hell with it all. _Sphene_ fastens the jeweled choker that Minask gave it a year after she told it. Other ancillaries appear and start to fix the favored segments hair. Compared to Minask, the segment's hair was stick straight and glossy. _Sphene_ piles it up on top of its head in coils before sticking a few of Minask’s favorite hair pins in to keep the coils in place. Other segments button up their dress uniforms making sure that _Sphene_ looks the best it can possibly no matter which body. 

 _Sphene_ carries Minask’s body to the shuttle bay. There the suspension pod waits that will be Minask’s coffin. Each step is painful. Minask is dead. And soon _Sphene_ will never see her again. The favored ancillary leads the procession as _Sphene_ tries not to let any of its bodies cry. The suspension pod has been decorated with blood red velvet and lace. _Sphene_ lays Minask in the pod. It arranges Minask’s hands to lay over her chest folded. _Sphene_ bends to kiss Minask with the favored segment. It’s beloved favorite. Many of the segment’s eyes start to tear up. 

Would it not be better to keep Minask in its holds? Instead of releasing her to drift among the stars? Then _Sphene_ could return Minask’s body if one day it can return safely back to the Radch space. No. It must release Minask. To keep Minask is foolish. What would it accomplish? Nothing. Nothing at all. Minask’s fate was to have her ashes combined with her ancestors or to drift among the stars with her comrades. 

 _Sphene_ chokes up again as it speaks first aloud, “I mourn today for Captain Minask Nenkur. She was my finest and bravest captain. She stood for me when no one else would. She believed in justice for even those who are overlooked. Minask fought well alongside her comrades. Her sword was quick. Her aim was true. Her strength was a rock for all who knew her. It was an honored to be commanded by her. May the gods bless her. May Varden grant her prosperity and peace in death.” 

And then _Sphene_ speaks silently through Minask’s implants. 

“My beloved favorite. How I have loved you. You were the first to ask me what I felt. What I wanted. You cared for me. You protected me. You saw me as more than an object to be commanded. You say me as a person in my own right. I loved you. I loved you, you foolish captain. I loved your dimples. Your laugh. I loved you hand on me. I promise you, Minask, my love that I will avenge you. I will avenge you. The Usurper betrayed us. I will make her suffer for it. I will make her remember your name as she bleeds out. Minask, I weep for you. But I will be with you. I promise.” 

Then _Sphene_ crawls into the suspension pod. It curls around Minask, the segment’s head on Minask’s chest. _Sphene_ kisses Minask taking her cold hand, lacing its finger through Minask’s. _Sphene_ closes its eyes before retracting from the segment. Another segment gives the favored segment a sedative. _Sphene_ feels itself sleep away as the segment slowly falls into a deep sleep. _Sphene_ will not feel the body die as it runs out of oxygen in the pod among the stars. That would have been too painful. Instead it will have the memory of sleeping alongside Minask one last time before she is set adrift. The segments each kiss Minask above the brow. The procession stops one by one for the kiss but also to lay the remaining flowers into the suspension pod around Minask and the favored segment. The last segment closes the suspension pod. 

 _Sphene_ begins to sing as the ancillaries launch the suspension pod. 

“Oh Daani, The pipes, the pipes are calling  
From glen to glen, and down the mountain side.   
The summer's gone, and all the roses falling,   
It's you, it's you must go and I must bide.   
  
But come you back when summer's in the meadow,   
Or when the valley's hushed and white with snow,   
And I'll be here in sunshine or in shadow,—   
Oh Daani, Oh Daani, I love you so!   
  
But when you come, and all the flowers are dying,   
And I am dead, as dead I well may be,   
You'll come and find the place where I am lying,   
And kneel and say an "Avé" there for me;   
  
And I shall hear, though soft you tread above me,   
And all my grave will warmer, sweeter be,   
For you will bend and tell me that you love me,   
and I shall sleep in peace until you come to me!”

 The segments step back. Each takes a razor and shaves their hair as the pod floats away into space. The hair falls to the ground as the pod starts to grow smaller and smaller until _Sphene’s_ sensors can barely pick it up. _Sphene_ aches inside. Part of it has been ripped away. Its core is intact but at what cost? 

 _Sphene_ says for the last time into Minask’s implant before she is out of range, “Beloved favorite.”

 Then the connection is broken.


End file.
